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Ultimate Reset + Emotional Eating

I am an emotional eater.  I'm also a binge eater.  The two love to intermingle and turn into a huge mess of emotional binge eating.  This is why diets never worked for me.  I'd start feeling too restricted and that would turn into feelings of deprivation and then, as always, life would decide to throw a bump in the road my way and bam! Gone would be the diet and there would be me, Jabba-ing out in the kitche on anything I could find.  Not a good way to live with yourself.

I got this under control for a long time, which was a huge part of the reason I was able to lose 170 lb in a year - I tamed the emotional part of me.  I found a way to center myself and stay grounded.  When you can center yourself and sit with your emotions, well, you don't really need to cover them up with food.  I think it's really important for people going through a weight loss journey to find counseling or read personal development or ultimately find some way of dealing with the emotional hang-ups about food.  Because obviously, food isn't just for nourishment.  It's a best friend, a boyfriend, a mental vacation, a security blanket, so many things. Those associations don't just disappear as you start moving through an exercise program.  

Anyway, about 2 months ago something happened in our family that almost broke up my marriage.  It was a really stressful time and all of the mental an emotional training I had gone through became obsolete.  For 5 days, I ate nothing but candy after having eaten very little sugar for a year.  That resulted in the paramedics needing to come to my house because my body reacted very extremely.  After that I did start eating balanced meals, but I was having extreme difficulty getting the binge eating under control.  I wasn't even cognitively thinking about it,  I was just doing it. 

Well, life comes in waves and while the big one hadn't quite disappeard, things were starting to even out and I felt like it might be a good idea for me to try doing the Ultimate Reset to get myself on track with food and 'reset'.  I ordered it, I picked a few meals out of the book to buy food for since it would have been too expensive for us to buy such a variety (I did quite a few grocery list mock-ups on Amazon Fresh).  I got through the first week perfectly with a few days of doubling up my snack because I was too starving - I have a really high metabolism and was at the point of shaking from being so hungry.  I was proud of myself and it was easy.  But then came week 2...

I started feeling really deprived.  Week 1 included more grains and some yogurt.  Week 2 was basically fruit and veggies with a teeny bit of quinoa here and there.  That feeling of restriction kept creeping in until I was hit with an extreme feeling of deprivation.  All I wanted was a protein shake or eggs or cheese or a taco... but those things aren't Ultimate Reset friendly.  As the feelings of deprivation strengthened, my emotional stability started to fail and half way through week 2, I broke.  I binged.  Oh, did I binge.  It happened 4 days in a row.  The weekend ended in McDonalds and Domino's and doughnuts and a whole lot of other food shame.  This is not a good place to be.

I'm in the process of recentering myself so that I can let go of the binge-eating and other bad eating habits again.  It is a process, I know from experience that it is not a one day fix. I have done this before and I can do it again and I am doing it and I will be successful.  I have worked too hard on my weight loss to relapse back to my old weight and I love the fitness lifestyle I am living now.  There is nothing that compares to having confidence in yourself like being fit gives you.  

I think the Ultimate Reset is a great idea for people who can handle it.  I think that if you are someone who is prone to emotional eating, binge eating, or any eating disorder, it's going to tap into those issues and bring them front and center and that's a really isolating and scary place to be.   


  • Comments
momluv3
WOW girl, you really hit home for me! I sure wish I could get a handle on it! I eat pretty clean, but there are those evenings and sometimes a day where I binge. Of course I always hate myself for in the end! I workout soooo hard and then let food just ruin it all!! UGHHH I would be at my goal already if I had a handle on it....emoticon

Posted on 8/2/12 11:45 AM.

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ToughMommy
So proud for you that you posted this! You can and will get it under control again. I believe in you!

Posted on 8/2/12 9:00 PM.

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RunFitness1979
Wow..I saw your post because I am on day 7 and just completely binged on sugary type foods...I was craving yesterday some yogurt and I did not like my meal last night so I had Tropical Strawberry Shakeology in place but it did not fill me up and i was hungry all night...today I feel horrible for doing this and I was a bulimic most my adolescense and i still have to be careful to not binge but thought this would help..until today...any advice?

Posted on 9/16/12 10:31 AM.

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TurboRachel
I couldn't finish the Ultimate Reset so I'm not sure how great my advice will be, but I can say this - it's okay that you binged. That happens in situations where we start feeling deprived = food means more than just nourishment to many of us and when it's taken away... it's hard. Forgive yourself for binging, it's okay. One binge here and there won't hurt you. If following through on the Ultimate Reset is important to you, then try again tomorrow and take it one day at a time. And if you find that you're having these urges more and more and that you're starting to tap into feelings you felt when you were battling bulimia, then you know this isn't the answer. And it's okay to stop.

The Ultimate Reset is probably very healing for many people's bodies, but for some of us, it brings up a lot of emotional wounds and when those feelings come up, those aren't exactly safe places to be. You know yourself better than anyone and you know if you're in an emotionally safe place or not. Stay mindful of how you're feeling and know that it's okay if this isn't the answer. There's no shame in needing to quit it if it isn't right for you.

Posted on 9/17/12 7:46 AM in reply to fitmentalist.

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sugarfree2
Sometimes I wonder just what my body is really trying to tell me when I am craving. Did I cut my calories too much for my exertion level? When I want that cookie is my body seeking fats? or calories? Or just comfort? I try to go for the nutritous stuff but sometimes I just gotta have the cookie. Guess its part of being human, never gonna be perfect. Just try to do better. I started Les Mills Pump today. Hope we can work out together.

Posted on 9/17/12 4:14 PM.

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donea
Wow Thank you for sharing your story, felt like you were decribing me! I have them same problems I can berate myself and throw myself off track fast and easier than anything else ever could. Keep up all your hard work darlin' you are a inspriation to others thats for sure. Remember we only fail when we stop trying. :-) Donea

Posted on 9/19/12 8:48 AM.

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