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Geez Louise! I just can't stand having such a big midsection! And for the past few days (especially today), I've just wanted 'something' to eat, but don't know what it is...I find myself going around the kitchen, just staring at stuff, but it just doesn't look appealing. I even had sweets and it didn't 'do the trick' like I thought it would. I have no energym and though I WANT to do a workout, I'm easily distracted, and don't end up doing ANYTHING! It's like my mind is trapped inside this lazy person's body.

Well...I guess I really need to get back on a better sleep schudule. I'm sure that's most of my battle! So, goodnight! Hope to see you's when I come back!

I took the P90X Fit Test yesterday, and I'm SCARED! I'm 'qualified' to do the X, and I'm excited that I can do more than the required minimums, but some of the 'events' (for lack of a better word), I'm SERIOUSLY out of shape! I could hardly last a minute for the wall squat...had to drop down til I was almost on the floor, just to say I was still "off the floor". And the jumping jacks? UGH! I thought I was gonna have a heart attack! I kept looking down at my daughter (I'm sure with pleading eyes) who was timing me, thinking she wasn't telling me the right times! And when I was "sprinting" while doing JJ's, my feet were hardly moving (but I was still hopping..I think)!

But ya know? I could picture myself afterwards with awsome abs, and killer arms! I'd LOVE to look the way I dream, but I know it's gonna be some SUPER HARD WORK! I'm mostly afraid of failing in the food part of it! I was reading through the books, and it said "eat right, or what's the use?" (I may be paraphrasing)... I know part of me is rationalizing..saying "I lost a bunch of weight, and looked great before without staying totally on plan, so I'm sure it's not THAT bad". I know I can't sabotage myself that way! I feel like the more I tell myself I have to eat healthy, the more I crave crappy foods!

I have P90X (finally) and now I'm finally going to try the fit test, to see if I can actually do it! I've been afraid, but it's just time to bite the bullet, and JUST DO IT!!!

I'll blog to tell how I did...wish me luck!