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ok...so i am going thru major health issues and had to slow down my p90x workouts right now...but I am walking as well....its just frustrating cuz i saw such hope and promise and now is the set back and it shows!  still stickin with the diet...had minor surgery last week and now CT scan tomorrow...sigh....hopefully we can find this thing...kick it in the butt and get back to workin hard!!!  :)

keepin my head up....

I feel so frustrated by the numbers!  Ugg....I see more of a difference than they show...and others do as well!  My health numbers are going up...so thats good too!  I just feel I am busting butt...literally....and eating right, and its not showing much in measurements...so I feel frustrated! 

Other than that....I feel really good.  This has brought about huge...HUGE changes in my life...not just food or excersize wise...but life changes...how I think, cope, handle and decide on things.  What I find interesting is I am Dealing with the past...the demons that plagued me to become this 389 pound Monster at one time...to the 242 pound person...and finding why I became this way.  Why do I turn to food for comfort?!!!  Its much like those that turn to pornography, sex, shopping, spending, games, gambling, drinking or drugs...its what makes you comforted at that time that you just want to RUN to something, someone, someplace.....I am learning to stop running from the demons and turn around and Face them!!!  It's hard, and scarey!!!  I can't begin to tell you the anger and tears that I have shed!!!  Reliving the pain...and finding, it hasn't totally changed...it is still there....some of those people who inflicted it are still there in my life and I need to Deal with them, and place my boundaries...and NOT feel bad or guilty about having those boundaries!  It is OK for me to have those...to protect me and my heart and my family!  I am learning the things NOT to do...to not enable those around me, my children, friends or family....to not place on them what is mine!!!  My burdens are mine to deal with...My kids don't need them...I have learned how to become Healthy...Body, Mind and Spirit....it is great and I am becoming more free everyday!  Everyday is a NEW day....yesterdays mistakes are over...just make sure you didn't cause others damage in them and if you did or someone damaged you...go to them first and deal with it...cuz if you carry it...you will wear it!  You will turn to whatever comforts you and wear it!  I don't want to wear it anymore!  I'm shedding all the old!  Watch out!  Here comes the New Wendy!!!

Well....that is what I have been learning and dealing with this past week....I hope maybe it helps someone else too!

thanks for sharing my journey with me!  Love to you all and God bless!

HA HA  I guess its a good thing that I cannot find time for the computer!  Less sitting....but it is why I haven't been "checking in" my workouts....I have been doing them and it is proving true!!!

Not only do I look better, I am feeling it and at my Doctors apt the other day my blood work all changed for the possative for the first time in a very long time!!!  :)  I was so thrilled! That alone is motivation enough to keep going....everything else is just bennefits!!!

I will forever be saying this but, Thank you Tony...you saved my life!  I truely believe that!  I love ya and God Bless YOU!!!

well I have not done this yet....and tho I have not been able to get on here to log my workouts...I have been doing them and keeping up!  It has been 2 full weeks on the program for me.  I have eaten more in 2 weeks than i did in a month prior to this!  LOL  I am doing my lean program with P90X daily and it is working!  I am so excited!  I can see the changes myself!  Already!  Its soooo fast!  This program pushes your limits and is so difficult...but oh so worth it!  I have more breath support and can do alot of things alot longer!  Its nice to keep up with my kids and encourage them and others along the way!  I don't feel "last place" anymore!

We did a preliminary weigh and measure yesterday....I was glad, cuz I thought maybe it was just all in my head...lol....but I have lost 4 pounds, 1.7% body fat, and 7 1/2" total...3" in my waiste alone!  In 2 Weeks!!!!!  its crazy!!!!!  i LOVE IT!!!

I must admit...i thought i would hate cardio...I don't I kinda like it, I started out hating Yoga X....I LOVE YOGA X NOW...LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!!!  My least favorite is core syn....and ab ripper x....but I push it thru!!!  Thanks TONY>......YOU ROCK!!!!

BRING IT!