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What a mental struggle these last few years have been. It has been worth it though. I'm still learning, but I think Insanity pushed me past my biggest hurdle.
I discovered that a person can be incredibly fit and strong and a little overweight too. Me! But I am learning from the error of my ways. Before, I believed that if I worked out hard enough, it wouldn't matter how many calories I ate. Keep in mind that I rarely ate over 2000 and rarely ate bad foods (holidays have been the exception). Which in my mind meant that I wasn't doing bad. Certainly better than most. That was my biggest flaw. I thought that I would still loose and be able to eat what I wanted...well...to my surprise...it is not so. That has been my mental struggle. My thinking was that if I ate under 1600 calories I would starve or at least be way to hungry to be worth it. Not true. When one is overweight, one has to eat under their individual Base Metabolism Rate. About 200-300 calories under, but not under 1200. From what I understand, under 1200 would put most people's bodies in starvation mode and eat away the muscle that burns fat. Below is a log of my struggles and successes. Writing all this down over the years has taken a huge part in my mentality changes that are proving to be bringing me success in my weight loss venture...of course, there is always room for growth.

(ISANITY 2009-2010)
FIT TEST: I was surprised by how good my numbers were. 130 switch kicks, 47 power jacks, 102 power knees, 40 power jumps, 10 globe jumps, 17 suicide jumps, 17 push-up jacks, and 66 low plank oblique.
FIRST THREE DAYS: Never been so sore in my life. I can feel every muscle in my body. Even the muscles in my hands and feet are sore.
2ND WEEK: Noticing big improvements in my cardio strength.
2ND FIT TEST: Shows improvement across the board. 120 switch kicks (better form), 64 power jacks, 115 power knees, 55 power jumps, 12 globe jumps (just made), 20 suicide jumps, 25 push-up jacks, and 80 low plank oblique. Highest calorie burn day in the first month was 468 on Pure Cardio and Abs.
4TH WEEK: 2nd month of Insanity is an all new level of sore. The first three days of this month reminded me of how I felt the first three days of the first month. A good 'worked out' sore feeling both times. Highest calorie burn day was 468 on Pure Cardio and Abs.
3RD FIT TEST: Even more improvement. 135 switch kicks, 68 power jacks, 123 power knees, 75 power jumps, 12 (solid) globe jumps, 21 suicide jumps, 31 push-up jacks, and 90 low plank oblique.
6TH WEEK: Holidays make it tough to loose weight. Didn't gain though. My BP is 107/71. I feel amazingly fit. Insane abs are harder than Ab Ripper X. Highest calorie burn days so far was 573 doing Max interval Curcuit in just under an hour and 650 on Max Cardio Conditioning and Abs in 1.25 hours. Noticing, w/ my heart rate monitor, I burn a calorie a second at 160 BPM. Hard to stay at 160 though. Averaging 135-140 BPM on the harder workouts. No official weighing or measuring until the end.

8TH WEEK: That ROCKED! Now what? I know...Let's do it again! After a short break of doing my own mix of workouts, I will.
Before I started Insanity, I gained 6 lbs and a few inches. Now that I am finished, I lost all of the six lbs and the inches that I gained plus my tummy is flatter, I am stronger than ever, and have superb cardio fitness. After I finished Insanity I decided to take up running again. Hadn't ran w/o a run/walk approach in over two years, but this run was different. Did 3 miles w/o any effort. I have also been purposeful in getting at least two 1000 calorie burns a week doing a 3 or 4 mile jog followed by a 1 hour Zumba class. I am already starting to see results from that.

I heard that Jillian Michaels, from Biggest Looser, has a Base Metabolism Rate (BMR) of 1600. That is to maintain her weight. Because I have been on a loose/gain/loose/gain merry-go-round for the last few years, I decided to check my BMR. I was somewhat shocked to find that it is 1525 calories. I had been sticking to a 1600-1800 calorie diet (plus or minus). No wonder I haven't been loosing! It is simple math...Da-oh! If I burn, w/o my hour of exercise, 1525 per day and I want to loose weight, than I have to eat a few hundred calories less than 1525 per day to loose. Why hasn't anyone ever given me the formula before this? So...the new caloric intake of 1200-1400, 300 calorie minimum burn in an hour (using heart rate monitor), and at least two 1000 calorie burn workout days a week. A 1000 calorie burn for me is the 3 to 4 mile (300-400 calories)jog followed by an hour of Zumba (600-700 calories) that I mentioned earlier.

(P90x THIRD ROUND June 2009)
DAY 1: It took two rounds to get my head on straight about the eating portion of this workout. After a long break, I am back at it. It feels great to be back.
DAY 40: Did Beachbody's two-day fast. It helped me loose 4 lbs and 4 inches. It also helped me mentally with eating. Down 8 lbs, 8 inches, and 3% body fat this round. 20 lbs, 18 inches, and 6% body fat since the 1st time I did P90x. Wearing two pant sizes smaller. Feels real good. Thirty more lbs to my goal weight!
DAY 60: Doing lots more 'boy' push-ups than girl push-ups. Time to keep a food log at fitday.com to get even better control of my diet.
DAY 90: Feel super fit. Noticing that Plyo is not as much of a challange. Time to do Insanity.

(P90X FIRST TWO ROUNDS 2007-2008)
Day 2: This workout is awesome! I have a ton of energy already.

Day 23: Whew! I made it thru Thanksgiving without gaining a single lb!
Day 30: Wow! I feel great! I am more flexable and stronger already and I lost 2 in. off my waist. I thought I would loose more weight though. Need to be better about my diet. Ab Ripper X are the most intense abs I have ever done.
6 pack abs here I come!
Day 67: Down 3% in body fat and lost 4 inches. An amazing feat concidering my track record for this time of year. See it most in my waist and arms. That doesn't suprise me with the number of push-ups/pull-ups (to many to count)
and the 1000+ abs I do per week. That will be well over 12,000 abs in 90 days! So, no hope lost. Just renewed focus on my goal.
90 days: Even though it took me almost the whole 90 days to face some truth about my calorie issues, I am extremely happy w/ the loss of lbs, inches and body fat. My fitness, flexibility and strength has had incredible results. I have seen the results of working out right w/o always eating right. Sure, there was changes, but I worked to hard to not have bigger changes. I am excited to do
another round of P90x with smarter eating so I can reach my goal. To loose 40 lbs by the time I turn 40.
120 days: Bringing it as hard as I can, but not breaking this plateau. I have been logging my food in a daily journal. It has been eye opening and time consuming, but time well spent. You think I will eat less just so I won't have
to log it in? NOOO, not me--well--maybe less bread.
My new goal is to cut the fat down to no more than 40g per day and to make that a consistant number. Also make my calories more consistant at 1600 per day. I am learning that eating healthy is not enough when you want to loose.
My hope is that I will start seeing inches and lbs fall off. Is 40g still to much? I guess I will soon find out.
Day 140: To my surprise, doing a food journel is working. After a week of logging my food down I noticed that I was eating more calories and more carbs and less protien than I thought. When I adjusted it to match my goal, I
broke the plataeu and began to loose again. Two pounds, another 1% of body fat down, and another five inches lost. I'm amazed and feel super motivated to continue this success.